ONE - Start with Yourself
If you want to win with people,
you've got to be a winner or at the very least be on your way to becoming one.
Also, being a Winner comes to
your value - “Winners are Valuable”. When you embrace your own personal value,
when you are secured in who you are, then you have become a winner.
Below are some things you must
do in becoming a winner:
Recognize your values
Accept your values
Increase your values
Believe in your values
Always remember that as human
beings, we never lose our values irrespective of what might have
happened and that not until you become a winner yourself, you
will never truly win with people.
TWO - Practice The 30-second
Rule
The rule of this notion is that
when you make contact with people, instead of focusing on yourself, search for
ways to make them look good.
The 30-second rules means
“Within the first 30 seconds of a conversation, say something encouraging to a
person”.
A good thing to note is that
there is no one who does not feel and do better when you give them:
Attention
Affirmation
Appreciation
Motivation helps people who
know what they should do to do it.
“A gossip is one who talks
to you about other people, A bore is one who talks to you about himself and a
brilliant conversationalist is one who talks to you about yourself” – WILLIAM KING
THREE - Let people know you need them
A leader can become greater
only when they realize they are the one who need people.
When the vision gets bigger
than you, then you are left with two options: i.e. give up on the vision or get
help.
As a good leader, always let
people know you cannot win without them; asking others for help is a greater
way to make them feel like a million buck!
Whenever a person feels he/she
knows what you don’t, it gives an ego boost.
FOUR - Create a memory and
visit it often
There is no one in this world
who does not understand the value of true memories. It’s something that
sustains people during the worst of times and inspired them during the best of
time.
Make
things happen, memories don’t find us – we find them.
Set
aside time to make things happen. Most memories we have are with the people we
spend more time with.
Plan
for things to happen most people don’t live their lives they just accept their
lives.
Find a
way to make something happen
Make
something happen together.
Show
that something happened
Talk about what happened
FIVE - Compliment people in
front of other people
A private compliment turned
public, instantly and dramatically increase in value.
Encouragement is oxygen to the
soul, when we give someone a compliment in public, is like giving that person a
wing like an eagle.
“Admonish thy friends in
secret, praise them openly” - PUBLILIUS
SYRUS
Six - Give others reputation
to uphold
” Treat a man as he appears
to be and you make him worse. But treat a man as if he already were what he
potentially could be and you make him what he should be” – Goethe.
Everyone enjoys the
encouragement that that comes from someone that sees and speaks to their
potentials.
When we backup high opinion of
others with an action, it helps their self doubt to evaporate and resources
their drive towards success.
Look past their past and give
them their reputations for their futures.
SEVEN - Say the right word
at the right time
“no man has a prosperity
so high or firms but that two or three words can dishearten it, and there is no
calamity which right words will not begin to redress” - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Right word said at the right
time encourages, saying the right words is not enough, timing is a crutial
thing in it.
When you say the right words at
the right time, it brings numerous outcomes. An important outcome it brings is “Trust”
even when said to a stranger.
EIGHT - Encourage the dreams of others
To loss a dream is a great loss
“Death is not the greatest loss in life; the greatest loss is what dies
inside us while we live” – Norman Cousin
Encouraging others in realizing
their dream is to give them a wonderful gift, the more you do the more they
will share their dreams with you and the greater the chance you will get to
watch them bloom.
You can never go wrong
encouraging the dreams of others.
NINE - Pass the credit on to others
Ways to start doing this;
Check your ego at the door. An
egotist is not one who think too much of himself; it’s someone who think little
of others.
Don’t wait – pass the credit as
soon as possible; even if the credit goes to you. The sooner you give credit to
someone else, the bigger it pays off.
When credit is being passed on
to others, their biochemistry change and create an “emotional stamp” that
forever associate you in their mind with their success.
TEN - Offer Your Very Best
Make the most of your gift and
opportunity, make everyday your masterpiece. If we give our very best at all
time, we can make our very life into something special and that will over flow
into lives of others.
Anyone can be an important
person to you if you see everyone as important, not just the people we like the
most – we will always offer our very best.
ELEVEN - Share a secret with someone
Sharing a secret with others is
an act of inclusion. When people are in the know, it been found to be a show of
attributes and adoration to their lives.
When a secret is shared it
increases the odds of a close relationship.
TWELVE - Mine the gold of good intention
To mine the gold of others good
intention, it’s something that give everyone hope. We need to continuously
check our attitude and work on ability to see things from others perspectives.
Forgiveness should not be an
occasional act but rather a permanent attitude.
Practice the golden rule by
appreciating what others intend, not only what they do in order to mine the
gold of good intensions in them.
THIRTEEN - Keep your eyes off the mirror
Learn to focus on others. Happy
people are the one who sought and found how to serve others with dignity.
Serving others cultivate health and bring happiness. Happiness of a lifetime is
derived from helping others and you only get to help yourself if you help
others.
FOURTTEEN - Do for others what they cannot do for themselves
No matter how much you think
you have, you always have the ability to do for others what they cannot do for
themselves. Be ready to lend a helping hand, small opportunities are often the
beginning of good enterprises.
FIFTEEN - Listen with your hearth
Be an effective listener – not
just to the words but also to the feelings behind the words. To listen with
your hearth, your listing habit must be active as this is an attitude that
produces a win – win situation in any relationship.
Let us be fully present in all
moment, this, the other party will be prompt to notice.
SIXTEEN - Find the key to their health
Make it your goal to know what
is important to those who are important to you.
Establish the fact that people
are different. Time changes all things including human heart.
Also act with integrity once
you found the key to someone’s heart. Only turn it on when you can add value to
that person.
SEVENTEEN - Be the first to help
It is the kind of thing anyone
can do regardless of your age, talent or socioeconomic status. Begin by coming
caring for other people.
EIGHTEEN - Add value to people
Value the people around you,
teach them what they don’t know and make them better than what they presently
are. Make time to know your most valuable people value. Failure to value your
people makes them less important in your presence and kills the spirit of
wanting to win with people.
NINETEEN - Remember a person’s story
You can develop a strong
relationship and a great connection by remembering and building a person’s
story. This also makes you special to that person.
TWENTY - Tell A Good Story
There is no one who does not
like a good story and telling it to people is a good way to renew ones
gratitude. It’s nice to tell a good story when telling people things, with
that; they will never forget all you have said. It also helps to captivate your
listeners.
TWENTY ONE - Give With No Strings Attached.
Generosity is an extremely
appealing quality for anyone that does it with no string attach. It really
makes that person a special one. Give unselfishly and you are sure of a gain in
return.
TWENTY TWO - Learn Your
Mailman's Name
You are bound to make more
friends and win more with people if you cultivate the habit of remembering and
calling people by their names. It is a good thing to recognize people with
their names as it is one of their most valuable possessions.
TWENTY THREE - Point Out
People’s Strengths
Put your people in their areas
of strength – it helps them to get more productive. Once identified, don’t
forget to point it out – it helps to boost their performance.
TWENTY FOUR - Write Notes Of
Encouragement
Cultivate the habit of
communicating encouragement to your people in writing as it is generally viewed
as coming directly from your heart and more genuine than when it is being
spoken.
Twenty Five - Help People Win
All it requires is “care” for
others, irrespective of your status or background. Just give your best in
helping them win, for this is the greatest feeling you can have in this world.
Your ability to make someone win will earn you a friend for life as there is no
one in this world who does not like to win.
“It is one of the most
beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another
without helping himself” Ralph Waldo Emerson
In Conclusion:
I would say this book has the essentials in adding
values to readers’ lives. Social and communication skills are some of the most
important skills to live a successful life. We can’t succeed without other
people. This book will help readers to improve such essential skills and I
would recommend for everyone not to only have this book on their bookshelf, but
to ensure they read and put to practice all that is been read in it!
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